NYCM Check in: 8 Weeks Left!! Did I make any progress??

I really really tried to step it up this week. I was far from perfect but I felt like I did better than I’ve been. 8wo-e1505000930751.jpg

It’s hard to really judge so I feel like the fall back marker is weight. And this week the scale moved UP half a pound. Definitely not the direction I want it to go but I’m just trying to remind myself that the number on the scale is not the deciding factor here.

I felt so confident with my workouts this week. I did get off my butt a few times when I reallllly wanted to stay in bed (like this morning. 1 minute “sprints” on the assault bike for 15 rounds. Killer!) but I’m sitting here thinking, well I skipped 1 morning run. 1 turned into a walk for a run. I didn’t go to yoga on Friday…. Hmm…

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I did get in my long run on Thursday- 12 miles in the morning and then I got in another 3 that night. I felt pretty strong ( strong but still slow) during the run and thought if it were race day I had a few more miles in me. Plus on race day you’re so excited and the energy is just buzzing that you always get about 4 or so miles that fly by. So I think I have 20 miles in me right now. The last 6.2 are gonna hurt hurt hurt but I CAN do this! Running is mental anyway right. I just need to repeat I CAN I CAN I CAN!

After my race on Thursday, I was craving a soda (I almost always crave a coke after a long run!) and a salad! So I ran over to Salad 2 Go on the way home and ate it immediately on the couch with Copper Mercury watching and waiting for any spilled bits.

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I got in 22 miles this week. Plus 2 lifts, kayaking 1 day- super fun- and a round on the assault bike. My pace is still beyond slow!! Which gets disheartening! Definitely need to do more speedwork and just push push push.

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THIS Saturday is the Flagstaff Half Marathon. I think I’m still in denial that it’s already here. I want to get in a short “long run” on Wednesday. I’m thinking 8 miles. And then training runs of course with a rest on Friday. This will be my 10th half so I’m pretty excited about it. I just gotta WORK!!

 

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NYCM Check In: 9 Weeks Out. It’s Been an Eye Opener!!

Real talk time, guys.

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I have just over two months till the New York City Marathon. An iconic marathon that I feel SO lucky I get to run this year. But to say I’ve been lazy and slacking is an understatement. I have given myself excuse after excuse to skip workouts, run less miles than planned, eat junk and be a quitter.

I am not ready for this race.

I ran a 5K (a 5K!) this weekend and yeah I was able to but it wasn’t a walk in the park. If it’s that hard for me to run 3 miles, how am I going to do 26? But I have 2 months to get ready.  To focus and crack down. It won’t be pretty. It won’t be easy.  But it’s possible and I CAN do it!!

So here’s where I’m at.

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Current weight: 161.4

  • This pic was me today at the gym. I do want to slim down for a myriad of reasons but #1 is because the less weight I have to carry, the easier it is to move it for 26.2 miles. I’m not going to be really focused on the number on the scale but I’d like to get it back down to what it used to be. I’m hoping for 10lbs gone by Nov. 5th but again, I’m not going to do anything crazy just to see a number.

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My huffing it pace: 11:10

  • This was my average pace for my last 5K. And to be honest, I could not keep this up for another 10 miles, let alone another 23.

I’m eating like an idiot

  • There’s no other way to say it. I’ve only just started following VB6, and I really like it! I want to keep it up at least till marathon day. I really think I feel better overall when I’m eating this way. But there’s still a lot to learn that goes with it (like how to not just eat ALL the carbs!) Time to go back to tracking my food/macros!

 

 

Things We Give Power To- Weight Loss is a Long Journey

This blog is just a little hobby. It isn’t much. Just a way for me to get my thoughts out and give me just tiniest bit incentive to stay on track. Only a few people I know “IRL” know about this place.

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I don’t blog with any regularity. I also don’t remember what I’ve said! Haha but since I do feel like I have a bit of anonymity and the tiniest of tiny soap boxes, there are some things I want to talk about.  I want to be more open and honest in 2017 (and maybe a bit more organized with these little posts of mine.)

Today I want to show off my blue shirt.

Here’s how I normally do my day. I go to the gym in the/my morning (I wake up around 2 pm usually) and go straight from there to work. (I work from 8pm to 6am)  I have been known to forget 1) underroos 2) a bra 3) my hair dryer 4) shoes. It’s a miracle when I remember to bring all required equipment it takes to make me presentable.

Today I went into my closet to grab work clothes and originally I planned to wear a dress but decided to wait till tomorrow so I can dress up a bit for NYE. Then I saw this shirt hanging in the back of my closet.

I bought this shirt years ago. From Ross I think. It’s not fancy. But when I bought it (4 years ago??) it was too small and I never wore it. But I didn’t take it back or toss it. It just stayed on its hanger.

Then I lost 50 pounds. And I tried on the shirt again and it fit! I remember being SO ecstatic. One more reminder that all my hard work paid off.

And then I gained 20 pounds (well 19 to be exact!)   Laying it all out on the table and I’m not proud at all to admit this. But since hitting my goal weight, I’ve gotten comfortable and back into some old habits. I’m nowhere near my highest weight and there is some muscle on this body of mine. But I’m up. And my clothes have been fitting more and more snug lately.  And I haven’t worn this shirt in a while.

So this morning, I stood in my closet trying to pack up for work and I saw this shirt and told myself I couldn’t wear it. I didn’t think I could fit into it. But lately I’ve been working really hard to overcome some of the issues I let plague me and that includes some BDD thoughts. So I grabbed this shirt and stuffed into my bag (and prayed it fit! I do keep an extra shirt in my gym locker. I can forget a hair dryer and still go to work but a shirt? I don’t think that would fly.)

I worked out (turned into a back day. No time for biceps…) and then I got dressed. IT FITS! I would dare say, it’s even roomy.

I gave this shirt so much power. I refused to wear it or even try it on because of what I let it signify. I was so scared of what it would mean “when” it was too small again. It’s just a damn shirt. Haha. I’ve worked hard to get where I am now, even if it’s not where I would like to end up. But guess what, my journey isn’t over!

The Trifecta of Weight Gain

I am injured, stressed and heartbroken. The trifecta of weight gain…

This past week has been a rough one. I’m officially giving up on this idea of running the Turkey Trot this year. I thought my ankle was getting better and I think I pushed it too far yesterday, because today I am hobbling! Better to skip a 10K and heal completely than risk further damage. Now I’m just hoping I’ll be ready for the 12K of Christmas on 12/10!

braced
braced and bruised!

I was able to see the chiropractor who, if you live in the Phoenix Valley, I adore her and definitely recommend. I got whiplash in the accident and she could feel the inflammation in my shoulders. I’ll have to go back 2-3 more times she thinks but she was so beyond helpful with insurance and everything. The ‘paperwork’ of all this post- accident stuff has been a hassle to say the least! Stress, stress, stress. But I’m making baby steps. I have had an amazing support system of family and friends that I cannot thank enough! So during this season of gratitude, I am ever thankful for them.

Then there’s the heartbreak. I know, again… This time was ugly and unexpected! Dating is so hard, you guys. So in between phone calls to insurance and icing my ankle, I’ve been checking my phone for texts that will never come and crying.

And then I eat.

I’ve been eating everything I shouldn’t! Falling into old (bad) habits. Grabbing fast food and take out because I really have been busy and want comfort food. Going too long between eating while I’m running around doing all these errands and then coming home and eating my way through my entire kitchen. Too tired to cook. Too sad to get up and be productive. Stressed out. Can’t stand for too long (let alone work out and at least burn off some of these calories!) And most of all, punishing myself with food.

And the holidays are here! It’s hard for everyone not to gain over the holidays. Temptations and treats are more than abundant.

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I recognize what I am doing. I know that each one of these factors, injury/stress/sadness are battles I need to fight for the sake of my health but when it’s 3 against one, I have been waving the white flag more often than I should.

before-and-after

Now is the time to be strong. To stand up to myself. To stand up FOR myself. Eating isn’t going to solve my problem; eating unhealthy will create more problems. It’s not going to be easy. I’m not going to be perfect. But I cannot give up on myself.