So so many of my plans have changed in prep for this half marathon, I don’t even know if I can list them all. The biggest issue I’m dealing with right now is:
I’m sick AGAIN!
I’ve had this hacking awful cold for about a week now and I can barely even breathe sometimes; its awful! I can’t believe I’ll be sick for another half marathon. It’ll be the third time I’ve done a half while sick. 3 out of 8. Those aren’t great odds.
I really wanted to PR on this run but, again, I’m back to just trying to get to the finish line. I had such plans and high hopes but I let sickness, family death, traveling, dating, and stress totally derail me. And I’m back to eating like a frat boy (that is, not great.)
I know I can do it. I always know I can. I can run 13.1 miles. I’m just going to go in as positive as possible and take the pressure of a PR off myself. In the mean time, I’m taking every single pill I think will help in the slightest to kick this cold and I can breathe again.
I am injured, stressed and heartbroken. The trifecta of weight gain…
This past week has been a rough one. I’m officially giving up on this idea of running the Turkey Trot this year. I thought my ankle was getting better and I think I pushed it too far yesterday, because today I am hobbling! Better to skip a 10K and heal completely than risk further damage. Now I’m just hoping I’ll be ready for the 12K of Christmas on 12/10!
I was able to see the chiropractor who, if you live in the Phoenix Valley, I adore her and definitely recommend. I got whiplash in the accident and she could feel the inflammation in my shoulders. I’ll have to go back 2-3 more times she thinks but she was so beyond helpful with insurance and everything. The ‘paperwork’ of all this post- accident stuff has been a hassle to say the least! Stress, stress, stress. But I’m making baby steps. I have had an amazing support system of family and friends that I cannot thank enough! So during this season of gratitude, I am ever thankful for them.
Then there’s the heartbreak. I know, again… This time was ugly and unexpected! Dating is so hard, you guys. So in between phone calls to insurance and icing my ankle, I’ve been checking my phone for texts that will never come and crying.
And then I eat.
I’ve been eating everything I shouldn’t! Falling into old (bad) habits. Grabbing fast food and take out because I really have been busy and want comfort food. Going too long between eating while I’m running around doing all these errands and then coming home and eating my way through my entire kitchen. Too tired to cook. Too sad to get up and be productive. Stressed out. Can’t stand for too long (let alone work out and at least burn off some of these calories!) And most of all, punishing myself with food.
And the holidays are here! It’s hard for everyone not to gain over the holidays. Temptations and treats are more than abundant.
I recognize what I am doing. I know that each one of these factors, injury/stress/sadness are battles I need to fight for the sake of my health but when it’s 3 against one, I have been waving the white flag more often than I should.
Now is the time to be strong. To stand up to myself. To stand up FOR myself. Eating isn’t going to solve my problem; eating unhealthy will create more problems. It’s not going to be easy. I’m not going to be perfect. But I cannot give up on myself.